Before everyone gets all irritated with my negativity, let me just say this: I am and always will be a believer that your chances of getting what you want in life are multiplied by thousands if you come at whatever you are doing with a positive attitude.
Thing is, this whole law of attraction thing has gone way too far. First it was think good thoughts and all your dreams will come true, and now I hear rumblings that if you get breast cancer or lose your job, you secretly wanted those things to happen. If your child dies, you were having negative thoughts right before the accident, thoughts that magically caused an airplane engine to fall out over a cornfield, and ruined your life.
Just stop it.
And here’s another crazy theory: go get a magazine, and cut out a picture of a yacht, or a mansion, or a Lamborghini. Tape it on your wall. Now, wait. And wait.
Approaching life with clarity of purpose is a great thing. I have no problem with that. But please, get up off your ass, save your pennies, work as hard as you can, and maybe, just maybe if you’re at the intersection of serendipity and preparation (I think Oprah says something like this but with different wording) the stars will align and you will get what you want.
I’m working as hard as I can to make myself a writing career, to envision myself a success, to accept that I might get exactly where I want to. I have several plans: If I don’t get an agent, and get published, I’ll keep working on my second novel, (which is so creepy, I love it). I’ll get my MFA. I’ll try to get a job writing. If I have to sometime down the road (please not) I’ll throw my apron back on and take some damn orders in a restaurant. I could visualize all day, and no agent is going to knock at MY door.
Of course I want to be a Stephenie Meyer or a Stephen King. But I might not ever get there, and I refuse to accept that the universe has somehow failed me or that I was somehow blocking a “flow” if it doesn’t happen that way. It’s just another sad symptom of our celebrity culture to assume that everyone is entitled to that type of success. You just have to be brave enough to roll the dice and see what happens.
I know proponents will say I’m twisting it all around, and I would like to reiterate that I believe the basic principles to be true. If you go around snarling at the world, or hiding under the blankets, you will probably not have a wonderful and happy time. But being the most positive person in the world doesn’t stop a spouse from cheating, a company from downsizing, or a house from falling on you, if that’s what’s going to happen. And don’t make me site the most obvious Holocaust and 9/11ish examples. Don’t tell me those people were secretly hoping to die. Making us so responsible for everything that happens to us is both arrogant to a degree that I cannot accept, and also adds a layer of stress that I don’t even need a little bit.
When I went into much needed therapy a few years ago, I was suffering from a bad case of hyper vigilance. I had convinced myself that the world was out to get me, and that if I took my eyes off of it, even for a second, it would all come crashing down around me. It has taken me a lot of work to get over that. I can do all the watching I want, and it won’t change a thing, and no amount of positive thinking is going to prevent the next tsunami, or even my next cold, for that matter.
I do my best, as we all should, to be true to myself and others, and part of that is reaching for my dreams, picturing myself living it all. Being fearless, being compassionate,and finding a way to accept what is, is plenty for me to work on, without taking on every negative thought I have, without blaming myself for all of the suffering I’m surrounded by and that I myself experience.
Of course, I believe that if you roll up your shirtsleeves and make an effort, the clockwork of the universe will crank and adjust to try and support you.These are all of the positive side effects of the law of attraction, and I accept them.
The rest is garbage, and the next time I hear someone tell me that a sick person secretly willed their disease or their accident upon themselves, I can’t promise I will restrain myself. That’s stupid talk. I’ve just had enough.
I think we should be more worried about fate than the power of our every fleeting thought. Now fate, I believe in.